All posts by Aguywhosucks1234

Imagine a group of male, 11 year old muggleborns being sorted in 2023 and the sorting hat sings the song, but then the muggleborns are like "Slytherin DEEZ NUTS HAHAISHDFIEHKJLVHCKXJHLEDJVHKESF" and then McGonnagal sands up and is like "Aight listen up you little-" and the pure bloods are like "Wtf-" but the half bloods are like *Flashbacks to the Family Reunion*

And thats how all four houses went into negative points faster than snape reducing harrys points by 70 in the half blood prince

Fast forwars later on in the year, all the common rooms can't sleep because the Muggleborns are giggling at cringe memes for 5 hours straight, but then a prefect tries to come and stop them and promptly gets sprayed with milk, much to the laughter of the muggleborns, who started saying "suss amogus" and "goofy ahh"

End of the year Mcgonnagal considers turning hogwarts into a no muggleborns school, because all four houses have points under -500.

[Mod edit: Removing profanity]

Harry comes home from St. Mungo's with Ginny after James Potter is born. His scar immediately starts hurting. Ginny is quite concerned, but the two shrug it off for about a few days

A few days later, Harry realizes that every time he looks at James his scar hurts. He becomes scared that James will grow up to be something far deadlier than expected

Fast forward a few years later, Harry gets a letter from McGonagall saying that he had stolen food from the Hogwarts Kitchens while wearing an invisibility cloak, using it to cream pie Albus in the face for being sorted into slytherin

Harry looks at the letter and goes:

"Ohhhhh...Thats why."

A group of Muggleborns introduce Monopoly

Gryffindor Gets constantly destroyed by Ravenclaw, but legit just doesn't read the manual and keeps playing, despite being listed 514 times as having broken the rules

Hufflepuff uses cosine of x to determine where the dice is going to land on, and uses it to win the game, using the 0th power property to pick if he should get park place or not, therefore winning the game only because all the other houses are disguisted at how much he sweated on the gameboard.

Ravenclaw reads the instruction manual constantly, and builds a catapult for the dice so that it can roll the exact amount for Ravenclaw to get the desired outcome

Slytherin Flips the table after losing once and brutally attacks ravenclaw with the board.