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Ron: "Are you a talking gargoyle?"
Gargoyle: "Do you normally talk to ones that can't speak?"
Ron: "I don't normally talk to gargoyles."
Gargoyle: "I should imagine many gargoyles are grateful for that."
Harry: "Thanks for talking to us. Let's go."
Hermione: "She didn't seem very happy."
— Finding one of the five talking gargoyles[src]

The Miserable Female Gargoyle (made 1737) was one of the talking gargoyles in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.[1]


It was located in the Transfiguration Courtyard of the castle. As of 1995, it was two-hundred and fifty-eight years old, and frequently reminded people of this fact.[1]

During the 1995–1996 school year, Professor Binns assigned his Fifth year students the task of listing five talking gargoyles as a homework assignment. Harry Potter located the gargoyles as a favour to Dean Thomas so that he could attend the first meeting of Dumbledore's Army in the Room of Requirement.[1]

Like the others, casting the Fire-Making Spell on the gargoyle causes it to breathe fire.[1]

Other statements this talking gargoyle made included:

"Don't know, don't care, don't ask me."
— This gargoyle complaining[src]
"Two-hundred and fifty-eight years I've been here. Two-hundred and fifty-eight years. And has anyone thought to clean the spiders out of my nose? Nooo they have not."
— This gargoyle complaining[src]
"The things I've seen, sitting here. It's amazing what you can see from the top of a plinth for over two-hundred and fifty-eight years."
— This gargoyle complaining[src]
"I'm two-hundred and fifty-eight years old, you know. And I think that qualifies me for a little bit of respect."
— This gargoyle complaining[src]

Behind the scenes


Notes and references

Hogwarts Castle
Locations on the ground floor

Astronomy Tower courtyard · Bean Bonus Room · Boys' toilets · Room 234-00 · Central tower courtyard · Chamber off the Great Hall · Chamber of Reception · Classroom Eleven · Classroom 1B · Corridor off the Entrance Hall · Entrance Hall · Great Hall · Great Hall balcony · Ground Floor Corridor · Herbology Store · House Point Ceremony Chamber · Link Building · Marble Staircase · Middle Courtyard · Northern Courtyard · Northern Courtyard Annex · North Tower courtyard · Out Of Bounds · Oxford Corridor · Paved grounds · Portrait Room · Side chamber · Staffroom · Staffroom corridor · Storage Cupboard · Storeroom · Storeroom courtyard · Suspension Bridge · Temporary Defence Against the Dark Arts Classroom · Transfiguration department · Viaduct Courtyard · Viaduct Entrance · Viaduct · Viaduct Courtyard Gatehouses · West Tower courtyard · West Well · Suspension Bridge foyer · The Quad

Portraits, statues and other artwork located on the ground floor

Brian Gagwilde · Circe · Gargoyles at the staff room entrance · George von Rheticus · Giffard Abbott · Glanmore Peakes · Godric Gryffindor · Google Stump · Greta Catchlove · Henry Bumblepuft · Lonely Male Gargoyle · Lonely Male Gargoyle's friend · Medieval couple · Merwyn the Malicious · Mirabella Plunkett · Miserable Female Gargoyle · Norvel Twonk · Old Posh Baron · People watching Quidditch · Staring Portrait · Professor Swoopstikes · Temeritus Shanks · Timothy the Timid · Violet · Architect of Hogwarts · First Headmaster of Hogwarts · Jocunda Sykes · Sarcastic Male Gargoyle · Portrait of a girl with flowers · Wizard with a walrus moustache